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I've created a collection on Observable with all of my Mastodon tools, in case you want them all in one place!! :heart_parrot:

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:heart_parrot: HELLO AGAIN!! :heart_parrot:

I've made a really simple tool for searching your outbox.json (Mastodon archive) file. It's all browser-based and all data stays on your computer — it's not uploaded to the cloud!

There's lots of room for additional features so feel free to suggest some! 💚

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, tho I don't think I ever wrote an actual post on this instance; here we go.

Hiyeeeee~~~! 💚 I'm Andi, I'm a London-based enby computer-y person who does a lot of data viz and Star Trek shitposting. I do photo at London's longest-running trans night, The Way Out Club, and am working on a book.

I'm also at:

- Instagram:
- GitHub:
- Web:
- Photo stuff:

18+ only pls! 🔞

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I think I've posted this before but I'm reposting it because I didn't pin it and can never find that toot. 😩

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TIL that "bookmarks" exist on Mastodon. Why am I only learning about this when I've been using Mastodon since 2017?

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we're seeing radness levels at about 88%

(88%) ■■■■■■■■□□

Ad: seeking a GIMP gimp 

Seeking quality photo editing submissive, must be good with Adobe Lightroom CC. Apply in my DMs.

@andi if this had happened to me i would have simply ended the voicemail with "i hope you got all that!"

HOWEVER, unlike in that Friends episode, your girl Andi kept her cool. Once the voicemail system told me "End of recording", it then went "Press star for menu", at which point it gave me the option to delete the message and which I (knock on wood) seem to have accomplished.

The moral of this story?

Fuck voicemail. 🖕

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This story isn't over.

So having just been woken to this massive orgy of stress, I start going off a bit:

"Oh my God, even when my Mom's trying to be helpful she just causes me stress and it always turns out like this literally every time she sends a gift yadda yadda" but add a lot more swearing.

In the background, from my laptop, I hear Skype go:

"You have 10 seconds left to record."

I, uhhh, had been inadvertently leaving my dad a voice mail this entire time...

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Cut to me using Skype, Facebook, WhatsApp, and every other messaging tool at my disposal to try and contact anyone in my extended family who might be able to wake my mom at 3 in the morning. I'm guessing she's at the cabin, so calling the landline at my parents' house didn't work.

Eventually the (poor, poor) Amazon guy gets annoyed and says he can't wait any longer, so I apologetically tell him I guess we can't accept it, and he lugs it down the 3 stories of stairs again.

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This morning rolls around, Dawn answers the door and the (poor, poor) Amazon delivery guy lugs the air-conditioner up like three stories of stairs.

"What's the one-time password?" he asks.

Dawn and I just look at each other; I check my email, my Mom's forwarded an email saying there'll be a password sent this morning, but then never sent it.

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So my mom, living in Canada, decided that she wants to get my partner and I a housewarming gift; we've been in a new flat since January, and she's seeing on the news that the summer is like lethal levels of hot right now in the UK, so she opts for a *whole-ass air conditioner*.

Brilliant, amazing, that's actually genuinely helpful — @Dawn and I are struggling to get any work done during the week because it's so hot. My Mom uses her Amazon UK account to order it, delivery scheduled Saturday.

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Holy fucking shitballs do I need to describe the 90s sitcom-esque calamity that just befell me.

Shitty night 

Cleaned the entire flat hoping to have company and now I'm sitting by myself in my empty clean flat and I sort of just want to cry

@thegibson Hey, how would one go about applying for a invite...? :heart_parrot:

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Nuklear Family

This is the personal instance of Andi N. Fiziks. Love me or hate me it's still an obsession 😘